Time to be more conscious?

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Iceberg imageI can’t fully explain the energetic or the astrological reasons or other reasons behind this but, in a nutshell, consciousness is being raised in a big way and people are really feeling it. Have you noticed how difficult last year was – more conflicts, more challenges, more illness, more change? Have any of you noticed how the beginning of this year started with a fair amount of overwhelm, having to deal with what’s going on inside and perhaps having that manifest physically? Whether we like it or not we are being forced to be more self-aware and conscious and when we don’t do this the results are generally those of struggle and tension.

This consciousness shift is about evolving to exist at a higher level of energy or consciousness and while gearing up for a while, it really kicked off in 2012. This may be difficult to understand or even believe but I cannot deny that it’s happening. It’s been amazing for me to see the impact on my clients in particular. I have seen so many people come for therapy because they are feeling that things are out of kilter and cannot make head of tail of why they are feeling so unsettled, battling so much, feeling so emotional or are experiencing so many physical symptoms etc. I have seen people come for therapy after just kind of getting by for so many years (and that is no longer working for them). I have seen people come for therapy who a couple of years ago I would not expect to step a toe in a therapy space – because, generally, males and older clients are not the first to come through the door! People are feeling the drive towards greater awareness even if they cannot necessarily put that into words.

As a result I have had many clients finding themselves, despite themselves, like a deer in the headlights, facing me on the couch. And I am so grateful to each and every one of them because every client I see is mirroring an aspect of my journey and helping me to be more conscious of my own ‘stuff’. For me too there has a been a huge drive to have to face my ‘stuff’ on a whole new level. Each person I see offers me the privilege of hearing true pain and struggle and seeing the birth of hope and transformation from those stories and experiences. Every client I see reminds me how truly powerful and creative we as humans are – even though sometimes we may need someone to help us to remember that and access those qualities again. Every client I see helps me remember how amazingly resilient we humans are (especially South Africans). Every client I see leaves me feeling filled with energy, optimism and joy and I am truly honoured to do the work I do, especially at this time when shifts are happening fast and with creativity and power!

If you are finding that things are really tough at the moment, instead of resisting it and fighting against feeling the way you are feeling, try embracing this as an opportunity for transformation, self-awareness and change. It can feel very scary to do that but I promise you you have the power and ability to face what you are being brought up against (or you would not be forced to face it at this time). Find someone you can trust and perhaps share a little of what is going on to help you to get some perspective, start journalling or meditating to help increase your awareness of what is going on for you or find a professional who can assist you to explore it and help you to access your resources, power and creativity. BodyTalk is an alternative treatment option to try (see www.bodytalksystem.com) and there are other treatment modalities out there. Even going for a therapeutic massage or reflexology session will help to shift some of what you are experiencing.

When you take the lid off the boiling pot the boiling water soon slows to a simmer – this is exactly the same with emotional and physical tension (which is all energy). Unfortunately when you resist the drive to work though the emotional, physical or energetic symptoms you may well experience an exacerbation of these or a sense of overwhelm. However,when you acknowledge and face what you are experiencing it will enable you to let go. You can again find some ease and some peace, and very possibly the joy that comes with living more mindfully, consciously and fully. Now is the time……

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I used to struggle deeply with holding space for clients. I would quickly become exhausted, and it felt incredibly frustrating. The thing I loved most—supporting others—was actually burning me out. Over the years listening to what was depleting me and what was nourishing me helped but I was tired of not being able to do so many of the things I enjoyed because it was too much for me. I had to also learn to make some fundamental shifts in my identity and my nervous system to be able to turn what was depleting me into something that was nourishing me instead, and to have the capacity to hold it all. Two weeks ago I hosted my first ever 3 night retreat. I had held space for women for up to a full day but never longer than that. I was concerned that I'd be exhausted afterwards. Instead, I came away buzzing with energy that lasted for days. No crash—just a full, bursting heart and a sense of spacious ease in my nervous system. It felt like I had been the one attending the retreat, not just hosting it! Here's what has changed to make this possible: 1) I no longer try to rescue people. I used to believe I had to do the work for them. Since I was a child I felt what people felt and I took on the emotions of others (many of you will likely have experienced the same as I find most of my clients with chronic fatigue and burnout are highly sensitive individuals). I took on the protector/rescuer role from a young age. This is often an unconscious trauma adaptation. After all, if the people around us are safe then we are safe so if we can protect and rescue them them it helps them and helps us (all done unconsciously of course). My chronic fatigue and burnout taught me two crucial lessons: if I’m not okay first, I can’t truly help anyone; and that I'm safe, supported and empowered. This helped me see my clients not as people needing saving or carrying, but as amazing, empowered individuals who rather need someone to walk alongside them on the path while seeing them in the fulness of their light. Serving from this place feels completely different—lighter and more authentic. 2) I shifted my identity, as above —from victim to empowered—and also released the belief that my worth depended on how much I helped or avoided upsetting others. 3) I adopted nervous system practices that make me more resilient and less overwhelmed by life’s demands, all the sensory input and everyone's needs. My nervous system more quickly returns to a rested space where I can receive vitality and nourish myself. 4) My spiritual relationship has deepened so that I no longer hold a belief that I am self-reliant and alone but, rather, deeply connected to a bigger, unfolding matrix that nourishes, guides and protects me. 5) I keep a toolbox of tools and techniques to calm my nervous system, connect to my body, and receive spiritual support. The sacred ritual of these daily habits sets me up to feel held and at ease. I don't always get this right. I am neurodivergent with a particularly neurospicy family and life can be crazy at times. While I manage to hold space for clients from a far more rooted and regulated place it's not always the case in my home and family life! But, damn, it's so much better than it was and I feel far more empowered. I'm so grateful for that.

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