Check in: Are you SuperWoman or the Tree?

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Do you wonder if your psychology and personality is truly impacting your chronic fatigue and burnout like you may have heard me say is possible?

Why not take a listen to Are You SuperWoman or the Tree (10 minutes) and decide for yourself…

Not too long ago in my life I was very proud of being Superwoman and that started very early in my life. I was often top of my class academically, I was sporty and involved in many clubs and played squash at a provisional level, and I was seen as a good, respectful girl (which was ironic because I started drinking way too much and did very stupid things in an attempt to manage my emotions and anxiety from as early as 14).

And that’s the crazy part – it was good to receive the validation and this helped me to feel a little better about myself and provided a false sense of control of my outer world, yet inside I felt I had so little control over my life and inner dialogue (for the record I wasn’t aware of this as I was too disconnected and just did what I did). 

In fact, I believe that most superwomen are actually driven by a powerless, anxious and unsupported inner child still looking for some emotional support and  acknowledgement even though they are now very capable and incredible adult women.

And let’s face it – who wants to be a boring tree?! The adrenaline-fueled, ever-moving and often fast-paced life of Superwomen is WAY more exciting right?!   Well, yes, but not when the result of that is not being able to move off the couch or meet the basic requirements of your life.

If you’ve been Superwoman for too long and the cracks are beginning to show come and join the Rooted Community where you will receive support to be more like the nourished, connected, alive, calm and abundant Tree.

I know it can feel really scary to even consider letting go of the old way of doing things but if you keep doing what you’ve always done you are going to keep experiencing what you’re experiencing now. And, yes, it’s scary but the incredible reward for your courage is not only improved vitality, ease, confidence, hope and joy but you’ll start to experience life in a way that you have never experienced it before – way more supported, sure of yourself, and plugged in!

It is ultimately a deeply spiritual experience when we choose to listen to our bodies and listen to our own inner truth to support our healing. I call this the gift wrapped in barbed wire! It was certainly a gift for me.

So, guess what….. I decided to extend the enrolment period for the Rooted membership by another 3 days as I really don’t want people to miss out. I deeply believe what you’ll receive can be as supportive for you as it was for me and has been for so many others I have had the honour to walk this journey with.

Doors are currently open to join the Rooted membership until Saturday midnight SAST. it’s a month by month commitment so you’re welcome to come and try it for a month to get a feeling whether this is for you.


P.S. you know the power you feel as Superwoman? Well that power is VERY possible as the tree and comes from a far healthier place. So, don’t worry. You’re not going to lose out on that!!

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I used to struggle deeply with holding space for clients. I would quickly become exhausted, and it felt incredibly frustrating. The thing I loved most—supporting others—was actually burning me out. Over the years listening to what was depleting me and what was nourishing me helped but I was tired of not being able to do so many of the things I enjoyed because it was too much for me. I had to also learn to make some fundamental shifts in my identity and my nervous system to be able to turn what was depleting me into something that was nourishing me instead, and to have the capacity to hold it all. Two weeks ago I hosted my first ever 3 night retreat. I had held space for women for up to a full day but never longer than that. I was concerned that I'd be exhausted afterwards. Instead, I came away buzzing with energy that lasted for days. No crash—just a full, bursting heart and a sense of spacious ease in my nervous system. It felt like I had been the one attending the retreat, not just hosting it! Here's what has changed to make this possible: 1) I no longer try to rescue people. I used to believe I had to do the work for them. Since I was a child I felt what people felt and I took on the emotions of others (many of you will likely have experienced the same as I find most of my clients with chronic fatigue and burnout are highly sensitive individuals). I took on the protector/rescuer role from a young age. This is often an unconscious trauma adaptation. After all, if the people around us are safe then we are safe so if we can protect and rescue them them it helps them and helps us (all done unconsciously of course). My chronic fatigue and burnout taught me two crucial lessons: if I’m not okay first, I can’t truly help anyone; and that I'm safe, supported and empowered. This helped me see my clients not as people needing saving or carrying, but as amazing, empowered individuals who rather need someone to walk alongside them on the path while seeing them in the fulness of their light. Serving from this place feels completely different—lighter and more authentic. 2) I shifted my identity, as above —from victim to empowered—and also released the belief that my worth depended on how much I helped or avoided upsetting others. 3) I adopted nervous system practices that make me more resilient and less overwhelmed by life’s demands, all the sensory input and everyone's needs. My nervous system more quickly returns to a rested space where I can receive vitality and nourish myself. 4) My spiritual relationship has deepened so that I no longer hold a belief that I am self-reliant and alone but, rather, deeply connected to a bigger, unfolding matrix that nourishes, guides and protects me. 5) I keep a toolbox of tools and techniques to calm my nervous system, connect to my body, and receive spiritual support. The sacred ritual of these daily habits sets me up to feel held and at ease. I don't always get this right. I am neurodivergent with a particularly neurospicy family and life can be crazy at times. While I manage to hold space for clients from a far more rooted and regulated place it's not always the case in my home and family life! But, damn, it's so much better than it was and I feel far more empowered. I'm so grateful for that.

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